Stop disrespecting Los Angeles natives.

"Everyone in LA is so superficial." 

"LA people only care about followers"

"Genuinely hate LA. Every conversation is about what you do for work and how you can benefit them. If you're not in fashion or entertainment, you're dead to them." - a legit comment on instagram

"It's so hard to make it in LA."

Shut the fuck up. Seriously...Those statements are so surface level. You are from Ohio, Utah, North Carolina, ETC and you're trying to make it in a city that is full of hard working black, brown, and asian folk. People from out of state come to Los Angeles with this crazy dream that they're going to make it big in Hollywood. No job lined up, no place to stay, just 200K followers on instagram and a stupid dream. 

Don't get me wrong I also love to live in delusion, but let's be a little realistic babe. A lot of people come to LA EXPECTING to be given the life they want; glamour, money, free PR and most importantly FAME. No one from out of state likes to travel past studio city, North Hollywood, or some fuck ass small town in the valley. Why? Because their ego is too fucking big to admit that they'd rather live in 3 bedroom with 7 roommates than live next to latinos or black americans. God forbid you have to live in south central. You're shacked up around other people who are not from Los Angeles...all complaining about how its so hard to make it in a city youre not from refusing to actually get a job to pay the bills. Just a bunch of stupid idiots telling each other exactly.

I thought it was common sense to merge yourself with locals in a place you're unfamiliar with to learn the areas and culture. People in LA are not the problem. It's the lazy losers moving here expecting to be given everything they want in life. Any big city you go to you have to WORK YOUR ASS OFF to get where you want to be. Nothing is given to you for free. Millions of people in this one small part of California and you think you from Utah stand out? Maybe in Florida you do. Just like New York, Los Angeles moves FAST. It's such a bustling city with so many hard working poc who do the dirty work for all of them. That nice restaurant you go to...yeah all the workers are poc; the people who built your favorite cafe; poc. They wouldn't be able to come to this city and enjoy what we have if it wasn't for the poor working poc class. 

Instead of the narrative that LA is hard to make it in...why don't you try actually working and blending in with the rest of us normal folk. It's okay to work part time at a cafe, bookstore, a server ANYTHING to help yourself out and intertwine with us Los Angeles natives. People who are from out of state truly miss out on an amazing community with working class people due to their big egos. I love my hometown city and I will defend where I'm from because we are regular people too. 

xoxo, 

Starra ⋆⊱༻𖥸༺⊰⋆

A poet met her poem

I mentioned to my girlfriend one time about watching the sunset on the beach. Immediately she was on board. She didn't moan or groan. She went completely on board with everything. I told her a couple weeks ago. She asked me to come over her house; I asked her are we just chilling or doing something. She said up to me...ᕙ( •̀ ᗜ •́ )ᕗ I instantly mentioned the beach. Heart pounding and feeling like she wouldn't want to do it. Having a past relationship that's coming from broken promises and dates never met; that anxiety of being turned down flushed over me. I sent the text anyway. I was met with enthusiasm and a girl who was just as down as I was. I was so excited this is something I've never done before and I always wanted to do. 

4:30 in the morning my alarm goes off, groggy, walking to the bathroom to brush my teeth and washing my face. I meet her back in her room and I see she looks just as tired as I do. I thought to myself..."she's just as crazy as I am." Two girls who are both hopeless romantics who found each other. On our drive to the beach I glanced at her and knew my life with her will be at ease. Broken promises/empty words is something that is just not in her character. A person who is true to their word; that meant the world to me. In that moment, my eyes were filled with stars as I was  looking at my galaxy. 

On the beach we put our towels down, sat for a little while, and we hugged. Something so simple and sweet. Stomach filled with butterflies;  I felt so filled with love. Gentle kisses and little cuddles while listening to the waves hit the sand. I love being lesbian. I love being able to experience new things with her. She said she's never been to the beach this early, neither have I...a first for us both. I love her so and She loves me. After we leave the beach, she tells me "Next time we should bring blankets and a pillow." Next time? Oh, you love being around me. You love...me. In every single lifetime, I would choose to be lesbian. Loving women is an amazing feeling but getting to fall in love with her specifically is something i'd want to do for an eternity. 

Early Bird

We lie low to the earth, our breathing aligned,

As tender and sweet as a morning can be,

With the slow, crashing water leaving worries behind,

Quiet and soft by the edge of the sea.

The sand drinks the water, soft, patient, and deep,

Like the quiet grace of your hand held in mine,

While the rest of the world is drifting in sleep,

We map out a universe, sweet and divine.

We are the shorebirds that fly side by side,

Resting our wings where the sea meets the land,

Moving together, as sure as the tide,

Wrapped in the morning, written in sand.

xoxo,

Starra. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁ ⟡  ݁. ⊹ ˖ . ݁

Oh Portland, I love you so

The first time I went to Portland I was 22 years old. I loved it so much! Ever since I've yearned for Portland like it's my lost lover. The weather, people, and "small town vibe" absolutely won my heart over. It's something about a walkable city I just cannot get enough of! 

Being from los angeles, a "walkable city" is laughable. We have walkable parts of the city but Los Angeles as a whole...walkable...those two things don't even go together. Finding bookstores, cafes, music stores, small shops, all within walking distance is something I think we has humans have failed to build within our society. We crave third spaces. Somewhere that we can get creative, socialize, and give our eyes new scenery. Being stuck in the same environment; work then home...it can make one's mental health decline like crazy. Doomscrolling is at all time high and It won't get any better the more we sit at home and do nothing! 

Many people from Los Angeles say it's very hard to find community within the city. They're right. You have to go looking for it because we have third spaces but no one talks about them...why? simply because people gate keep like a mother fucker. However, when going to Portland I find that so Many locals were telling us so many cool things to do! They thrive on community and a third space. They don't care if you're from Portland or not. If you come with good energy they fuck with you period. That's simply from my personal experience, everyone has their own life path and journey!

I always wondered would I ever move out of los angeles...my hometown...everything I've ever known. I have everything I could ever want in los angeles; maybe that's the problem. Everything is too readily available at my hands. Leaving my state is such a mature grown thing to do. I love traveling and experiencing new places; I also love knowing I have the comfort of going back home. 

I have to go back to Portland again and again. With my besties (Khad and Shanece), My girlfriend and again with my besties HAHAAH. I want to visit all over Oregon not just Portland. I want to see the full beauty of the state. Wow, could I become one of those hiking granola people?

As an earth sign I do long to be around nature. As much as a city girl I say I am I LOVE nature and being outside. It's so beautiful. Being surround by trees and its dead silent does something absolutely amazing to the mind. Sitting there in no sound, crisp air, nothing but the sound of the trees and animals in the forest. My journal and I would go absolutely crazy. 

After writing about absolutely nothing lol point is... living in Portland is a dream of mine, we need more third spaces along with walkable cities, and as scary as it is moving from your home; its something I must do to grow into the person I aspire to be. 

xoxo, 

Starra ˚₊‧꒰ა 𓂋 ໒꒱ ‧₊˚

 

Tea at Shiloh (˶˃ ᵕ ˂˶)

I love romance...lesbians do it the best.

Before my girlfriend and I became an official couple she took me to a tea house I've been seeing on TikTok for years. My braider told me she did a workshop here years ago and it was always on my bucket list to go. 

What is Tea at shiloh?

Tea at Shiloh is a paid reservation only community based tea house. Based in Art district, Downtown Los Angeles California. Very cozy shoeless intimate vibe for solo dates, friendships, or dates. They have special selection of tea offered at every event and it is unlimited throughout your entire stay. They offer Day and Late night sessions Thursday-Sunday that are priced differently. Daytime sessions (10AM-3PM) are typically $35. During the daytime it is a relaxing calm vibe perfect for reading, journaling, sketching/any art activities or chatting quietly. Laptops are restricted here; I love that so much honestly. It would be amazing to do work here but I love that it is restricted be it forces us to be in the moment and actually socialize. The late night events do range differently starting at $42 and can go up to $46 on the weekends. They offer live music, unlimited tastings on the selected tea, tarot readings, gaming cards, and a slow night life. 

So what the hell does this have to do with being lesbian? 

Well everything! 

My girlfriend and I were simply friends at the time and she fully surprised me with us hanging out here. It was so cute because she wouldn't tell me when we were on the way. She was so cute and nervous when we  were on the way. It took us forever to find the door because it was hidden so we were running around like a chicken with our heads cut off haha. When we walked in I remember looking at her so happily bc shut the entire fuck up! NO WAY!! You just casually pulled this out of your pocket like it was nothing! It was so simple for her...so easy...the way she was nervous if I would like it or not was the cherry on top. 

The entire night was filled with laughter, intimate talks and a cute confession from me; we played we are not really strangers and got to the nitty gritty. When you have a crush on someone I highley recommend playing this game. "give your partner a hug. not the crappy kind. A warm and fluffy one." WELL. Was it nice and fluffy? HAHAHA probably not, because we were so awkward but it still felt fluffy in my heart. The questions really make you dig deep and open your heart up. "how does one earn your vulnerability? Have I earned it? How can I earn more?" or "What's our most important similarity?" Such an intimate moment between us that made me like her even more. My stomach was filled with butterflies and I felt so overly euphoric. 

Everyone that was in this establishment were women. One straight couple. That's it. Women yearn for community, deep feelings, and a bonding shared moment. When you're a lesbian things like that come naturally. We don't complain we just do. I see TikTok all the time talking about how women will plan a cute date with their friends easily and quickly. Women know effort and we put in effort with each other. Now the question arises...Why are straight men never held to the same standards when they're with their girlfriends. Straight women will complain about their boyfriends doing XYZ and never leaving. There's always this trope "overly dressed girlfriend and underdressed boyfriend" but if someone's homegirl came underdressed while they were overdressed the friendship would be at stake. Why do we as women hold ourselves to a higher standard than we hold men? Men are always complaining about paying for dinner and "never getting anything in return". Women hinting over and over again about wanting a "Boo-Basket for fall' and never getting one. Straight women need to realize they ARE the prize and to stop letting low minimun effort pass by. Stop centering men and life will feel free. Men have no excuse to date poorly because the world was built around them.

When lesbians date it isn't about what can I get in return. A date I go on with my girlfriend is almost 100% something I'd do with my friends! Hell we were friends at the time; I would absolutely take my best friends to Tea at Shiloh!! What an amazing way to bond with someone who matters to you. This post isn't to over romanticize lesbian relationships because homophobia is real and rampant. I'm lucky to live in Los Angeles, California. I'm lucky to be born into a family with elder gay and lesbian representation. So I do have it easier than say someone who lives in small town Missouri. That being said, even in sunny California I still get stares at people staring at my girlfriend and I. Especially because we are two black lesbians at that. DOUBLE WHAMMY!! Lesbians already had to put up a fight. Black lesbians had to put up an even bigger fight. So yeah, I am going to love out loud and date properly because we couldn't before. The effort is there for all the lesbian sisters who had to hide their relationships before we were LEGAL. The point of the entire post is Lesbians have to deal with hatred, stares, and so much more. We do romance better because we couldn't before. 

xoxo,

Starra .𖥔 ݁ ˖   ✦    ‧₊˚ ⋅ 

Welcome! ˚.⋆꒰১ ໒꒱⋆.˚

 Hi pookie Welcome to my black gay girl universe!

This is my digital diary; much like my TikTok I will be talking about any and everything here!! Since I was a child I always loved the thought of running a blog. Tumblr was the very first time I stepped into the world of having a blog and let me tell you that was the SHIT! If you're born after 2005 you've probably didn't get to experience Tumblr at its PEAK. Honestly for the better...eating disorders, thin bodies, and white skin was at an all time high! I was more on the one direction/kpop side of things; reading gay fanfics I should not have been reading and reblogging shirtless pictures of harry styles. 

I can't even tell you exactly what will happen on this blog but I hope we all have a fun time together! I am such a yapper in person; a very big extrovert! So I figured it would be so fun to have a ask box on my page that anyone can submit anonymously; a safe place to vent, ask questions, or if you just want to tell someone good news! 

I have so Many hobbies that I'd love to share with you guys! This blog is also holding me accountable for all the books I never finish hahah I can't create a page for reviewing books and nothing is there...I'd look like a loser poser! I feel like I start hobbies and once I realize I can do it I abandon them. I hate that trait about myself! I want to change that; not sure if adding another hobby to the mix is the smart decision to do but fuck it we rise!! I absolutely love substack; in a way that inspired me to do more writing and make a blog! I' so excited to see where this goes! Thank you for joining my journey!

xoxo, 

Starra .𖥔 ݁ ˖   ✦    ‧₊˚ ⋅

About Me!

 All About Starra

• January 14 2000 (26 years old)
• 1 kitty cat named Rice
• WLW; Lesbian
• Los Angeles Native
• Kpop fan since 08 
• Favorite book genre: Thriller & Horror!!
• Favorite TV Shows: Modern Family, Bobs Burgers, Pretty Little Liars, The Originals
• Favorite Movies: Coraline, Shrek 1&2, Despicable me ALL, Princess & The Frog, The Little Mermaid LIVE ACTION
• I'm 5.7 and a half (does that matter idk?)